"that envelope thingy"

this clip from the big bang theory has a special place in my heart:

falling up

last night after work, i made my way to my sister’s house, as my routine has been for the last, oh... year and a HALF. it’s funny; i pay rent on a house that has lately become my personal (and very large) storage unit. i don’t mind. i enjoy every minute with my sisters, franklin, and eva. =)

natalie and i spent the entire evening reading shel silverstein's book "falling up" to eva. the WHOLE book. if you've never heard of mr. silverstein before you are certainly missing out on some very hilarious and very witty poems. his books are for EVERYONE to enjoy. and that’s just what we did.

one of my favorite poems from his book falling up:

Long-Leg Lou and Short-Leg Sue
Went for a walk down the avenue,
Laughin’ and jokin’ like good friends do,
Long-Leg Lou and Short-Leg Sue

Says Long-Leg Lou to Short-Leg Sue,
“Can’t you walk faster than you do?
It really drives me out of my mind
That I’m always in front, and you’re always behind.”

Says Short-Leg Sue to Long-Leg Lou,
“I walk as fast as I’m meant to do.”
“Then I’ll go walkin’ with someone new,”
Says Long-Leg Lou to Short-Leg Sue.

Now Long-Leg Lou, he walks alone,
Looking for someone with legs like his own,
And sometimes he thinks of those warm afternoons
Back when he went walkin’ with Short-Leg Sue.

And Short-Leg Sue strolls down the street
Hand in hand with Slow-Foot Pete,
And they take small steps and they do just fine,
And no one’s in front and no one’s behind.

never too young for chipotle

dear mr. chipotle,

i think i found my youngest best friend today. i took my three month old niece to chipotle and she LOVED it. well... she didn't exactly say those words but i knew how she felt. (whispering: i have unagi.) unfortunately, she wasn't able to eat or drink anything while there (pause for a moment of silence) BUT! once those teefers of hers start growing in, it'll be the FIRST thing she gets to eat.

love,

your biggest fan

a $300 secret

i have a secret. an amazingly, wonderful secret that is sure to make someone i hold near and dear to my heart squeal with delight and perhaps squeeze out a tear or two. psh! who am i kidding. this person's eyes are going to be swimming for days! (giddy with de!ight)

ode to burt reynolds

chelsey and i went to pf changs last night. we got a LITTLE carried away. i was mooing like an english COW and she was sticking lemon SEEDS up her NOSE. and somewhere along the way, we thought we'd make an ode to burt reynolds with NOODLES. hahaha.

and somehow i'm still single...
how can that be! i might
as well have fun while
i still am. hahaha.

i've got a problem...

i love putting puzzles together. its very relaxing for me after a long day at work. but you see, unfortunately for me, i have a cat who likes to LAY ON the puzzle WHILE i'm trying to put it together. it just DOESN'T work.

you WILL give me a hug

i have a scrubbin' of a brother who is not keen on physical affection like myself. i try and i TRY but unless its a special occasion (which for him it NEVER is) then he'd never consider it. so... to get around his stubbornness that seems to run so vibrantly through our family, i tried the back door for a hug from him. i mailed him MONEY and put this note on the outside:

"attention! by opening this card you are accepting FULL ownership of the hug and kiss that have been applied by your loving sister. refusal to do so will result in GRAVE consequences. love you!!! =D"

all i have to say is OWNED jeffrey. and i know you love me. even if you're not a hugger. but don't worry, one day you WILL be. i'm counting on it.

i love you. =)

UPDATE (07/01/10): he opened it. =D

a sad day to be a rug

yesterday was a sad day to be a rug...

what started out as a normal happy cleaning day turned into an ugly murderous day.

you see, my george loves to leave his mark wherever he goes and he doesn't listen when i tell him to pick up after himself. i seem to be FOREVER vaccuming up the trail left behind him and his furry body. and my bathroom rug? it's his place of choice when sprawling out on the cold tiles. since my rug is so thin, i can't vaccum it and my lint rollers just aren't cutting it anymore so i decided to toss it in the washing machine to see if that would do the trick.

oh, it worked alright. but not only did it take the fur off but it took the THREADING off too!

now all i have left is a CLEAN and UNUSABLE bathroom rug. =(

i liked it better covered in fur...

ready. set. SMILE!

have you seen this american express commercial?

well my sister natalie and i have and we FELL IN LOVE with the idea of finding smiley faces in every day life! we started spotting them a few months ago and with the help of corey, april, brian, morgan, and chelsey, we have made a nice little collection for ourselves.

so here we have it. our collection thus far:

ready. set. SMILE!

failure to communicate...

my sister bethany and i live together, go to church together, and yes, we even work together. needless to say, she and i have had our fair share of disagreements over the last couple of months. she and i are like black and white. everything about us is the complete opposite. its been a bit rough lately because we've been spending SO MUCH time together. so much so that our boss has picked up on it. below is a video he sent her and i. i'm the one talking and bethany is the one that GOT BEAT.

we DIED laughing!!!

south park yourself!

last night, my mom, little sister and i LAUGHED OUR HEADS OFF as we south park'd our family. allow me to introduce them all to you... =)

our father who LOVES to hunt and play call of duty:

our mother who LOVES to garden and text her babies:

galilee, the eldest, who LOVES living in the city and changing her hair color every day:

natalie, the second eldest, who has the most sensitive nose and can smell anything a mile away:

franklin, her husband, who LOVES his dog and his video games and FOREVER has a 5 o'clock shadow:

bethany, the third eldest, who LOVES to paint and dye her hair RED and BLACK:

jordan, the fourth eldest, who is AWESOME and HILARIOUS and QUOTES all things stellar:

jonna, his wife, who LOVES the city AND her music and COFFEE:

me, who LOVES texting and music and george and SITTING ON THE TOILET:

jonathan, the third youngest, who is FREAKING HILARIOUS and LOVES video games:

jeffrey, the second youngest, who NEVER LEAVES HIS ROOM and LOVES to play video games:

and finally allyson, THE YOUNGEST, who LOVES her animalS, well ALL animals for that matter, and music and playing video games with her brothers:

the end.

el fin.

das ende.

el final.

a book of mom

i love my mom. she is hands down the most hilariously ridiculous person i know. and i, out of SEVEN siblings, was the only one who inherited her ridiculousness. (LIES! we ALL did. muaahahaha!)

to give you some background... my mom will hear a phrase or proverb and quote it back to you YEARS later COMPLETELY backwards. or she'd even call something so standard in the english language something WAY off. its one of the most precious things about my mom. we would laugh and laugh every time we'd hear her say one. and until just recently, my family and i have started collecting her "mom-isms" as they come across in conversation and someday, we're going to publish them. someday. =)

here are just a couple of the ones we've collected so far:

mom: "don't forget to pick up the greg foreman."

dad: "cindy? where is the heating pad?"
mom: "its under the bed on the passenger side."
me: "uhhh.... mom? which side do you sleep on?"
mom: (completely innocent and nonchalant) "the driver's side."
WE ALL DIED LAUGHING!

mom: "well that went over like a lead brick." [translation: that went over like a lead balloon.]

mom: "don't put all your chickens in one wagon." [translation: don't put all your eggs in one basket.]

mom: "you're just two corks in a bottle!" [translation: you're two peas in a pod.]

you're a RIOT mom! and we LOVE you for it. =D

redeemed!

look what my mom and DAD sent me in the MAIL!!

what a stinker. hahaha.

i now have chicago il, indianapolis in, nashville tn, altanta ga, tampa fl, new mexico nm, dallas tx, raleigh nc, cleveland oh, st louis mo, puerto rico, china, and now…. the TWIN CITIES! i’ve got quite a collection for someone who doesn’t travel much. =)

h&y

i LOVE hoops and yoyo. these guys CRACK me up!

ps. you are SOOOO cute!

timing is everything

this was NOT the look on my face

two seconds later

when the earring was PULLED OUT

by the little rug rat.

my name means what?

okay, so i was curious and i ACTUALLY looked my (first) name up in the urban dictionary (see this post). according to the ud, i am "the sexiest girl in the world." HECK YES! and... "the most adorable, retardedly funny, easy and fun person to talk to. has a sense of humor that never disappoints or keeps you from laughing, and she always has a smile on her face no matter what. and even though she doesn’t know it, she is very beautiful and smart."

yes? yes? keep talking....

"someone who knows what they want and can get it. once you meet a real stephanie, don't ever let go."

oh...
i get it.
ha. ha. ha.
my MOM probably wrote all that.
oh well, who cares. it was fun to read. =D
look up your name and let me know what it means.
just DON'T look up the name franklin.

i said DON'T!

southerners

my sister-in-law lives in nashville, tennessee. she told me that school was canceled due to the snow. this is what she sent me as "proof" of the snow as seen from her front door. school? CANCELED!? psh! ...southerners. (shaking head)

i'm a big softy

so small. so innocent. so soft! =)

the saturday curse

when i first moved down here, i was super excited to hang out with my big sister, natalie. unbeknownst to us [mmm... good word. like that? =)], we were in for a doozy.

our FIRST saturday together? we ran out of gas and got stranded. in the rain. and had to PUSH the JEEP in our flip flops as cars WHIZZED passed us. big cars too! big enough ones that could have EASILY pushed/towed us the quarter of mile we needed to go. THANKFULLY, tomas (who we think was russian) stopped and helped us. and get this. his car was SO much tinnier than ours. we didn't care. we were GRATEFUL!

oh, and we when we were pulled up to the pump by our russian savior, we  realized we were on the WRONG SIDE! aaaahhhhhh! we still made it work anyway. hahahaha.

our SECOND saturday together? natalie and i decided to go shopping and stopped at the bank before heading out. after stopping at the bank, we wanted to keep ourselves out of TROUBLE so we went to get gas. JUST to be safe. and guess what. we LEFT the debit card in the ATM machine at the BANK! we couldn't get it back and had to cancel the card. and by we i mean her. she got scolded. poor natty. hahahaha.

[no photo could capture just how much shame we felt.]

after that, we called it quits and decided it wasn't safe for us to hang out together on saturdays anymore. we took several months off thinking our bad luck would "go away". i WOULD have been happy to report that nothing much has happened with us since those days but...

JUST yesterday, natalie and i decided that we'd waited long enough and thought it would be safe fur us to hang out once again. we spent the day doing a little paint shopping for her house. we bought some samples and  even made it home safe withOUT running out of gas and withOUT losing any cards! yay for us! well........ after painting a few areas to see which color we liked best, i  took a step back to see all our spots and BACKED UP into the FRESH paint with my BRAND NEW hoodie i got for christmas! i got paint ALL OVER the hood! we frantically ripped it off hoping to save it. THANKFULLY the paint was water soluble and we were able to save my hoodie after all.

it's nice to know things like this don't JUST happen to me like some would like to think. ;)

...oh, and natalie and i officially quit.

i've been elfed!